I am IN LOVE with Minho Oppa :D
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All Out Of Love Xiuhan
I'm lying alone with my head on the phone
Thinking of you till it hurts
Minseok sat on the couch, staring intensely at the phone. He was having an internal battle with himself over whether or not he should pick up the phone and call first. It had been, what, 6 months ever since he last talked to the man who broke his heart, Luhan.
His fragile hand reached out to get a hold of the phone and he started dialing Luhan's number. He remembered it by heart. His fingers paused at the last digit and fear of rejection took over him, he let out a sigh and threw the phone back on the table.
"Coward" He cursed at himself.
He stared at the phone for a while more and attempted to call a couple of times, but each time failed just like the first. Frustrated with himself, he stood up and grab his blue sweater on the hanger (the one that Luhan gave him on their 2 years anniversary) and headed out the door, hoping that the cold air would knock some sense into him.
As he wandered down the street of Seoul, memories of Luhan popped into his mind. He shook his head with the intention of erasing the images of the man who he once loved, and still loves, but there weren't much luck. Luhan was like a tattoo imprinted in his mind and heart, it was so hard to get rid of and it hurt whenever he tried.
And what would you say if I called on you now
And said that I can't hold on
Luhan sighed as he glanced over to the phone for hundredth times today. Every time he tried reaching for it, something seemed to hold him back. He bit his lips and pondered what would be the right thing to do, so many questions popped in his head that he didn't have the answers for.
"What would you say if i call?" Luhan mumbled to himself.
Luhan exhaled loudly as he lie back on the couch, his arm resting over his forehead as he thought for a moment. He finally sat up and glanced around his apartment. It was so empty, so cold, and he felt so lonely. It had been so long and he missed Minseok, so much. He missed his voice, his smile, his warmth. His everything.
Tears found their ways out of Luhan's eyes as he picked up a photo of him and Minseok kissing on their 1 year anniversary. It brought back so many memories, memories that he didn't want to hold on to yet he couldn't seem to throw away either.
"What should i do Minseokie?" He whispered.
I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
Minseok looked around the familiar street. How did this happen? He didn't quite know. All he knew was that he decided to let his feet take him where ever but he didn't expect them to take him back here. There he was, standing in front of the apartment he once shared with Luhan. Just looking at the scenery brought tears to his eyes. He decided to walk away before he did something stupid.
Once again, he wandered around, looking for a way out but it all seemed so confusing. He glanced toward this way and that way but it was so overwhelming. He felt so lost. Why did he feel like that? He lived there for over two years and it hadn't been that long since he left. Surely, he should still remember the ways but then something hit him. It was always Luhan who was there to guide him through, he was never alone on these streets, Luhan was there with him every minutes of the way and it was impossible to focus on anything while Luhan is around.
"I'm so lost with you ..." Minseok found himself say but he couldn't deny it. It was true that he felt absolutely lost without Luhan around and it made him wondered how he was able to be on his own through those 6 painful months.
There's no easy way, it gets harder each day
Luhan groaned as he buried his face in the palms of his hand, all this thinking and crying was giving him a headache yet somehow, he couldn't seem to stop. He let out a bitter laugh as he kicked the empty cups of coffee on the ground. He wasn't a coffee drinker until he had met Minseok. He remembered how he came home so drunk one day and it made Minseok so worried and mad that he refused to talk to Luhan for two whole days. After the painful silence Minseok had made him promise to never drink again and Luhan surprised himself by agreeing. He still kept that promise even now that they're broken up. If it was anyone else Luhan wouldn't care, but then again, Minseok wasn't just anyone else.
Luhan chuckled as he shook his head and looked down at the ground again. He thought he was going crazy because for a moment there, he saw someone who looked a lot like Minseok standing outside his apartment. He scoffed and crumpled the paper cup in his hand.
"Why would Minseok be here? He has better things to do anyways" Luhan muttered quietly. "How am i supposed to move on when it seems like all i see is you?"
"It's not gonna be easy is it? It just gets harder and harder each day ..."
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from this long lonely nights
I want you to come back and carry me home
Away from this long lonely nights
Minseok opened the door and was greeted with great disappointment. What did he expect anyway? Luhan being there when he came back? Fat chance. He exhaled loudly and plopped down to the couch, didn't even bother to take off his shoes. He lie there and stared at the boring white ceiling, his leg and arm dangling off the couch. For some reason, it felt weird and strange in his own house.
He didn't know he was crying until it was getting harder to breath. His nose were clogged and his cheeks were damped with tears. It just hurt so much and he wasn't sure if he can deal with the loneliness anymore. Sat up from the couch, his hand reaching for the phone and he started dialing. Luhan's number. He pressed the call button, no more regrets this time.
"I want you here" Was the first thing he said.
The other line went silent. Minseok didn't care as he pressed the phone closer to his ears and started sobbing. It didn't matter if he seemed pathetic and desperate because he was. He was desperate to hear Luhan's voice and be with Luhan but he knew he was too late because he never got a response from the other line.
I'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong
Minseok held his knees to his chest and hugged it tightly as he sobbed, still holding the phone in his hand because he felt like that was the only way he could connected to Luhan again. Luhan never answered him and it felt like someone stabbed his heart but what could he do? He was too late, Luhan didn't want anything to do with him anymore. Minseok always thought the pain of breaking his leg was the worse thing in the world but in all honesty, it was nothing compared to this.
The bell rang and Minseok lost all his will to move, so he sat there, hoping whoever it was will eventually give up. 10 minutes passed and the bang on the door could be heard clearly and it frustrated Minseok because he was in no position to deal with anyone right now. He sniffed and went toward the door, not letting go of his phone.
It felt like a slap in the face because Minseok thought someone was playing a very cruel joke on him. There he was, standing in front of Minseok with sweat dripping from his face, his hair was a mess and he was still in his pajamas but he looked stunning nonetheless. Minseok wanted to pinch himself to made sure he wasn't dreaming but one second was all it took for Luhan to plunged himself toward and embraced Minseok in a bone breaking hug.
Minseok heard the sound of his phone dropping on the floor and it probably broke but Minseok didn't care. Why would he? The man he loved was now here, in his arms. What more could he ask for?
They stood there for what seem like eternity before both of them broke down in each others' arms. Minseok buried his face in the crook of Luhan's neck and breathed in his scent, it made him felt relax because it confirmed that he was really hugging Luhan.
"I'm sorry" The both said at the same time and Minseok shook his head.
"Luhan... Take me home" Minseok sniffed.
Luhan pulled away gently, just far enough for him to see Minseok's face and close enough to feel each others' breaths. He cupped Minseok's cheeks and used his thumbs to wiped away the tears before leaning down and kissed him. Just a light, innocent and caring kiss.
"Okay baby... okay" Luhan whispered against Minseok lips before pressing them against each other once more.
-----
Holy shiet, another Xiuhan ><
Sorry, i just love them so frickin much okay?
So, i was taking a walk down memories lane yesterday lol
Listening to old songs really give me the boost to write and give me new grooves ^^
So now i have this long list of what i want to write and i already organize the pairings and such
Now i just have to wait for one of them to call me and i'm on it :D
I finished a Taoris drabble before this but when i read it again i was like blek, It was cheesy (almost like the Taolay drabble, yuck lol) and just ugh. So i decided not to post it up =.=
I should probably work on a Taoris to make up for it or something lol idek ...
P.S The next few fics would probably be songs-inspired ^^ Hope you guys don't mind :D
DATE:Thursday, November 15, 2012
TIME:{11:37 PM }
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